Are you a mother feeling exhausted and drained no matter what you do? Do ‘little things’ in life suddenly irritate you, and you can’t understand why.
These may be signs of mom burnout.
So, what is mom burnout exactly, and how do you know if you’re heading down its path – or already dealing with it?
Keep reading to find out more.
What is Mom Burnout?
Mom burnout can affect any mother, working and non-working mothers alike. It’s a state of pure mental, emotional, and physical depletion from one not giving time to their own needs.
When parents constantly put their kids and everyone else’s needs before their own, at one point, motherhood and parenting your children will come to an implosion/explosion.
Moms who get consumed by the daily pressures of life can feel overwhelming exhaustion and lose sight of their well-being. After prolonged periods of this stress, it leads to mommy burnout.
Motherhood is hard enough as it is, but single moms get another layer of difficulty.
From juggling responsibilities with kids and the demands of single motherhood, it can quickly become overwhelming for any mother who doesn’t care for her needs.
What Does Mom Burnout Feel Like?
Emotional Exhaustion: An overwhelming feeling of mental, physical, and emotional tiredness. Symptoms include irritability, cynicism, anxiety, depression, and detachment. Mom burnout is often a sense of being overwhelmed by the pressure or stress of carrying out day-to-day tasks or obligations with no real plan set in place.
Physical Exhaustion: This occurs when the body is pushed to its limits without adequate breaks, leaving you feeling drained of energy and struggling to complete additional tasks. Recovering from physical exhaustion typically requires rest, proper nutrition, and hydration.
Mental Exhaustion: It manifests as feeling entirely mentally and physically drained. Your thoughts are foggy, and decision-making becomes more difficult. You don’t have the energy or motivation to engage in activities that usually bring you joy. Your racing mind keeps you awake at night. Mental exhaustion can also lead to feelings of sadness or despair as you struggle to find the energy for everyday tasks.
Spiritual Exhaustion: It can feel like a fog, blocking out clarity and joy from your life, a heavy weight on your shoulders. No matter what you do, you struggle to make it through the day. You have difficulty finding the motivation to get started on anything. In addition to physical fatigue, spiritual exhaustion can breed feelings of depression, lack of enthusiasm, and even hopelessness.
What is Parental Burnout?
Parental burnout is caused primarily when parents put too much pressure on themselves as parents. This pressure often falls over onto their children too, which can cause strife between parents and kids.
Some common causes contributing to parental burnout include:
Impractical expectations of themselves and their children
Parenting styles that focus too much on perfectionism
A feeling like no matter what they do, it’s never enough for their kids
Parenting a new baby for the first time
A lack of support systems
Inflexible job hours or schedules
Financial stressors
Can Stay-At-Home Moms Get Burnout?
Being a stay-at-home mom can be rewarding and challenging for motherhood. Nonetheless, this role can lead to any parent’s ill health if not appropriately managed.
Exhaustion preys on stay-at-home moms due to a lack of social interaction, constant overworking themselves, mom guilt, dissatisfaction with creative needs, and financial strain.
All these factors can contribute to an increased risk of exhaustion and overwhelm to a mother.
What is Working Mom Burnout?
Working mom burnout is a phenomenon experienced by many women who work a full-time or part-time job in addition to running a household and raising children.
It is characterized by complete exhaustion, lack of motivation, and physical and emotional fatigue.
Symptoms often include difficulty concentrating or focusing on tasks, impatience with family, and constant tiredness. It can also lead to guilt for not being able to give enough attention to her family and kids or not living up to one’s professional obligations.
Some reasons many women fall into this trap are:
Lack of purpose; having nothing to work towards
Having a parenting style that tries to be perfect at home and in family activities
Being unrealistic at work by always working late, taking on extra tasks, and going the extra mile
Taking work-related stressors home due to continued communication from colleagues outside business hours
Feeling like you are always behind on errands and tasks as a parent due to competing priorities
Not having enough time or resources to accomplish everything on the ‘to-do’ list
Juggling too many tasks at once without being able to take a break
Always putting your kid’s needs, motherhood tasks, work deadlines, and everything else first
The Signs of Mommy Burnout to Watch Out For
Burnout can sneak up and leave any mother feeling drained, unmotivated, and overwhelmed.
It’s essential to take the time to identify the signs so that you can take proactive steps to manage them.
What are Mom Burnout Signs to Watch Out For
Here are some common signs of mommy burnout from parenting:
Low self-worth, you are your most prominent inner critic
Your health isn’t a priority in your daily actions
You are neglecting your physical appearance
Loss of energy toward parenting and dealing with your kids
Easily overwhelmed when you run errands
You’re becoming a nervous and anxious person
You have headaches, nausea, upset stomach, and insomnia
Irritability toward family life and children
Withdrawing from relationships
Your parenting style causes you to feel depersonalization
Being argumentative and unwilling to compromise
Taking criticism personally
Anger outbursts directed at kids
Negativity overload toward children
Lacking a sense of accomplishment
Difficulty concentrating
Lack of sleep, stress, chronic fatigue
Feeling guilt all the time
Decreased motivation and productivity
Your house is in constant disarray
Mom Burnout Symptoms
Symptoms of mom burnout can interfere with a mother’s ability to care for her children or manage daily life.
It’s essential to recognize and identify the following symptoms of mom burn so you can take early measures to combat it.
Hopelessness
Moms often experience hopelessness because of the overwhelming amount of responsibilities they have.
Between working, raising children, and managing a household, moms have a lot to do and can become overwhelmed. They may feel that no matter how hard they work, it’s never enough to meet everyone’s expectations.
This can lead to feeling like no matter what a mother tries to do; nothing will ever be good enough, leading to hopelessness.
Lack of Motivation
When moms experience symptoms of burnout, they often lack the motivation to do various tasks such as shopping for their kids, working, cooking, attending appointments, or completing chores.
A parent may start to lack the energy and desire to spend time with their kids and family, engage in activities outside the home, or even watch a movie for a couple of hours.
Constant anxiety can also sap motivation for self-care activities like exercising, meditating, and taking time for themselves.
Depression
When a mom experiences depression, they may feel sad, tired, and hopeless. They have difficulty concentrating and completing tasks.
They may isolate themselves from family and friends and neglect household duties.
In extreme cases, moms who are severely depressed can become suicidal. It’s important to seek help from a mental health professional if depression persists for an extended period.
Fatigue
Mothers feeling fatigued may feel sluggish, have difficulty focusing, experience decreased energy or experience mood swings. Fatigue can affect all aspects of life, making it difficult for a mom to be productive and enjoy the things they used to love.
To minimize fatigue, mothers should practice good habits such as getting enough sleep, taking personal time, eating nutritious meals, and exercising regularly.
Also, mothers need to give themselves downtime to recharge and restore their energy levels.
Insomnia
Most moms experiencing insomnia may have difficulty concentrating, trouble falling asleep and staying asleep, and an overall feeling of exhaustion.
Insomnia can lead to irritability, anxiousness, depression, and other mental health issues
Muscle and Joint Pains
Many moms experience muscle and joint pains caused by physical and emotional exhaustion.
When mothers don’t get the necessary rest or make time for themselves, their bodies begin to feel the strain.
Muscle and joint pains can result from this sustained strain, leaving moms overwhelmed and unable to cope with all that’s on their plate.
Taking regular breaks, making time for self-care activities, and getting plenty of sleep are essential in helping moms prevent muscle and joint pain.
Headaches from Chronic Stress
Headaches can stem from prolonged stress and mental exhaustion.
When a person is experiencing burnout, they may be unable to cope with everyday tasks, leading to heightened anxiety levels and increased muscle tension around the head and neck.
This physical tension then leads to headaches which can range from mild to severe. To help reduce their chances of developing headache symptoms, it’s important for those who experience burnout to find ways to relax and manage their stress levels.
A Weakened Immune System
While many of us strive to make it through our busy schedules and workloads, we often forget to pause and reflect on what our bodies need to stay healthy.
Without proper care, our minds and bodies can become overwhelmed and prone to fatigue, leading to a weakened immune system.
What Causes Mommy Burnout
When all this exhaustion builds up, your body’s energy level gets completely drained. Feeling as if there is no end, these issues become too much to deal with.
What causes mom burnout?
No Clear Purpose in Life
Without direction and a goal to pursue, people may drift without feeling accomplishment or satisfaction. This can cause them to become overwhelmed and exhausted, negatively impacting their overall mental health.
Without an end goal or something to strive for, people may feel lost or stuck in a rut, leading to depression or agitation.
Furthermore, the lack of clear purpose can lead people to become too focused on small tasks that don’t help them progress toward anything larger. This makes them feel drained from constantly chasing short-term goals with no real reward.
Lack of Self-Compassion
Self-care is an integral part of sustaining our daily lives. Not focusing on yourself can lead to exhaustion and anxiety.
Lack of self-care often involves:
Not taking time to rest
Lack of engagement in enjoyable activities outside of work or school
Ignoring signs that our bodies need care
Neglecting to set aside time for yourself makes it challenging to maintain your energy levels and focus on the tasks ahead, which can quickly become a bout of fatigue.
It’s important to practice self-care as a preventative measure against burning out. Treat yourself to periods of rest. Engaging in activities that bring you joy is key to maintaining your health during intense strain.
Too Much Pressure
There’s intense societal pressure to be perfect, which can add to a feeling of unhealthy perfectionism and unrealistic expectations for moms and their children.
With an increased focus on social media, they may even feel pressured to “keep up” with other moms and ensure their children achieve certain milestones at a certain age.
These factors create a major stressor for many moms that can be very difficult to navigate.
Working Long Hours with No End in Sight
Prolonged stress without breaks or a sense of accomplishment can lead to fatigue, apathy, and an inability to concentrate. People may also experience feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, and exhausted due to the lack of freedom or structure in their work life.
Physical effects can include headaches, insomnia, weakened immune systems, and physical ailments from sitting too often.
Working long hours can lead to personal problems such as strained relationships and lowered self-esteem.
Unbalanced Hormone Levels
Stress can be difficult to deal with, mainly when unbalanced hormonal levels cause it.
This can be especially hard for mommies, as they often balance multiple responsibilities and demands on their time. Menopause and other hormonal imbalances can create a lot of emotional and physical stressors for mothers.
Taking the time to assess hormone levels and make needed changes can help alleviate some of the stress caused by these imbalances.
Poor Nutrition
When your body isn’t receiving the necessary vitamins, minerals, proteins, and carbohydrates to feel energized, you may feel fatigued and overwhelmed by simple tasks.
When you don’t get adequate nutrition, your immune system is weakened, making you more prone to illness.
Also, nutrient deficiencies or imbalances can affect our hormones, leaving us feeling irritable and exhausted with no relief.
Financial Stressors
Financial stressors can lead any parent to the point of overwhelm.
When faced with uncertain economic times, moms feel increased anxiety from the unknown. Financial stressors can also lead to physical health issues such as fatigue, headaches, and changes in appetite.
If these financial pressures become too much to handle, the person will likely experience ill health from juggling many responsibilities.
With proper planning, budgeting, and lifestyle management, financial stressors can be managed responsibly to reduce the risk of burnout.
Not Taking Breaks and Giving Yourself a Date Night
When you don’t take a break from your work, it can cause your energy and enthusiasm to dwindle over time. You become less productive and may even feel overwhelmed or exhausted.
Without regular breaks, the same task feels like an endless cycle of effort with no reprieve. It’s essential to take the time to step away from your work to refresh your mind, body, and spirit. All you need is a couple of hours or less.
Without regular pauses to breathe deeply and check in with ourselves, tension builds up until we are eventually overcome by overwhelm or even burnout.
Try scheduling a night out with yourself, a family member, a friend, or a partner for a positive pattern change.
Excessive Worrying
It’s normal for a parent to worry from time to time, but it can lead to health ailments when it becomes excessive. Worrying can become a cycle: The more you worry, the more you think about what’s causing it, which leads to more worrying.
Excessive worrying can also be a sign that there is a deeper issue present in your life – such as unresolved trauma or prolonged stress. Identify how you can take steps to alleviate those fears or concerns. Try to acknowledge and address the underlying issues causing you to worry excessively if you are a good mom.
Additionally, take regular breaks throughout the day, practice healthy coping strategies like yoga or mindfulness meditation, and talk to someone (a therapist or trusted friend) if needed.
Lack of Support System
When we don’t have people who understand us, believe in us, and are willing to help us, it can cause feelings of loneliness, isolation, and frustration.
Staying motivated and energized when facing daily challenges and stressful situations cannot be easy without support. Thus, a robust support system is essential to maintaining our well-being and preventing burnout.
Is it Normal to Feel Burnout as a Mom?
It’s normal to experience a little mom burnout from time to time due to the demands of motherhood. However, prolonged burnout can have serious consequences.
Studies have found that people experiencing prolonged burnout are more likely to suffer from anxiety and depression, as well as physical fatigue. They can also become more prone to getting sick due to their weakened immune systems and can die earlier.
How to Prevent Mommy Burnout?
Burnout can be an all too common problem. To stay energized and productive, here are some excellent burnout prevention strategies:
Identify Your Core Values: Core values are essential to who you become. Straying from your core values causes internal conflict, hinders your personal growth, and leads to a decline in your physical and mental health.
Spending Time with a Best Friend: Your bestie can make you feel safe, understood, and accepted. They can also provide perspective and guidance regarding difficult decisions you have to make. For many mothers, having a friend who is always there for them no matter what can help build resiliency and self-confidence and even boost their overall mood.
Be More Intentional: Living with intention, being purposeful with your time, and thinking about what you want to accomplish, increases self-confidence and happiness.
Build Self-Discipline: As a significant element of personal development and growth, self-discipline positively affects all areas of our well-being. It’s the first step to achieving greatness and essential for combating and preventing burnout.
Know Your Life’s Purpose: Shaping your goals and guiding your decisions, your purpose gives you a sense of direction, motivates you to get up in the morning, and live each day to the fullest, creating a more meaningful existence.
Live in the Present: Staying present means focusing on each moment of the day and nothing else. It is the here and now, and nothing else matters.
Listen to Your Body: There are endless signals your body will give to let you know you’re en route to burnout, including headaches, clamminess, panic attacks, shortness of breath, or digestive issues, to name a few.
Identify the Sources of Your Stress: The more you know the causes of burnout, the more you can do to protect yourself. Is it coming from a crazy kids’ schedule or a hectic work schedule, or are you putting your duties as a mother ahead of your self-care duties?
Build Self-Confidence: Accept who you are as a human being, every strength and weakness. The more you are aware of your imperfections, the quicker your self-confidence increases.
Put Yourself First: Taking care of your mental health is your responsibility; it’s doing what’s best for you without harming others. When we over-give to others without first Giving To Ourselves, we can deplete our vital energy, leaving none to take care of our needs.
How do Moms Recover from Burnout?
For most mothers, the best way to recover from burnout is to prioritize self-care and take a few hours to create an action plan.
Here are some great ways to recover from mom burnout:
See the Big Picture: Focusing on the bigger picture helps you prioritize, set better goals, and improve time management. Developing a Complete perspective of the situation allows you to stop stressing over small things and focus on the overall view, allowing you to spend more quality time with your kids.
Stop Trying for Perfection: Striving to be a perfectionist puts strain on your mental and physical health, leading to a long list of health consequences. Procrastination is a self-sabotaging mindset that creates feelings of inadequacy, kills productivity, and hinders goal attainment. Remember, progress not perfection.
Stop Caring About What Others Think: It’s absolutely none of your business what others think of you.
Stop Being a People Pleaser: Stop suppressing your needs, desires, and feelings; it comes at a cost to your overall well-being.
Learn How To Say No: You cannot do it all. Learn to say NO and take back control over your days.
Reframe and Redefine Your Expectations: Have flexibility; allow room for error. Being less attached to specific ideas will enable you to be more realistic and reduce cognitive biases’ influence.
Ask for Help: From getting advice from other mothers to finding ways to balance work and family life, asking for help is essential in making motherhood successful and enjoyable.
Create a Healthy Morning Routine: Adding routines into your day helps combat stress, anxiety, and burnout by giving you structure and organization.
Implement Healthy Daily Habits: The proper habits promote health and wellness, keeping you happy, well-rested, and strong. They’re a powerful way to create a positive mindset, helping you achieve your goals with less mental energy.
When to Seek Professional Help
If you feel like you’re at a breaking point, it may be time to reach out and seek professional help.
Talk to your doctor or therapist about how you’re feeling and ensure you get assistance to manage your burnout.
Conclusion
Burnout is a serious issue that can adversely affect your mental, physical and emotional well-being. It’s essential to be aware of the signs and symptoms and take action to prevent and manage burnout.
Self-care strategies such as getting enough me-time, engaging in relaxation activities, and setting realistic goals are critical tools for preventing and managing burnout.
Additionally, it’s important to recognize when extra help is needed from friends, family members, or professionals to stay on track with your mental health and career goals.
